An Addendum

An addendum to the previous blog: someone asked me if anyone at the library had access to my blog, and I said that one or two people might know about it. It was pointed out that this might hurt my chances of getting my job back. My response was thus:

Fuck it.

I don’t write this blog for a job, or to satisfy other people. It is done, solely, to satisfy me. I am not going to censor what I write in case it may upset someone who reads it. I write it to get stuff out of me that is better off not spinning around in my head, but exposed in some way. I can’t afford the therapy that someone said I needed; but I can afford this. Better out than in, as Shrek said.

This blog is my practice pad, my counselor’s couch, my stage and my shield. It is my connection to my friends and a way to let those who want to know what is up. But it is mine, and if it bugs you, then there’s more than just a passing reason for it.

I stand behind, before, and beside anything I have ever written here, because it had a validity and truth to it when I wrote it. May my feelings change? Of course they might. But that doesn’t invalidate them. Think on what Emerson said about consistency of thought:
“A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds, adored by little statesmen and philosophers and divines.” (read the rest after for some really good stuff; and what is before it isn’t so bad, either.)

If this blog costs me a job, then it was a job I was bitching about, and therefore losing it might be seen as a blessing. The library thing was satisfying. But if the program is going to change into something that serves the library more than it serves my kids, then they can go to hell.

-Zeepdoggie